Sorry-But Not Sorry

I am sorry that my sentiments on stopping rape-victim blaming are not politically comfortable enough for you.
I am sorry that you’re so ignorant to think that the rapist’s side of the story is suppressed.
I am sorry that you were not taught that sexually violating someone else’s body without their consent is wrong and unjustifiable.
I am sorry that you are not a woman, having to live in constant fear of a possibility of harassment.
That you are unknowing that actions against women are always diverted to them being in the wrong.

Where do I begin to educate you young sir?
Perhaps with a recent case. In the The Namibian newspaper dated 9 January 2018 (which was yesterday) a headline of a story read: “Father rapes own daughter
You know how old she was?
Six (6).
You know how old he was?
Fifty-two (52).
Which side of that story is it that you want clarity on?
Would you want a list of countless rape stories?
How about a mother who was raped after being dragged into a riverbed while carrying her two month old baby?

I am terribly sorry that you’re backwards, not sympathetic enough, not informed enough and ignorant.

But I am NOT SORRY for speaking up about, and against rape and victim blaming!

So do me a favor, with time reflect upon your words and think about “what if it hit close to home”.
Think about your mother and sisters, about your daughter or one you might have in the future and if any of them are raped, and then repeat this (your very words):
“I am sorry mom or sis or my little daughter (angel), but you’re trying to tell us that we must always blame the person who rape (you) without hearing both sides of the story?”

Practice telling them that over and over (that’s the lesson I will give you today).
Maybe only then will you grasp the damaging magnitude of your words and the pain and plague they allow to grow in the world we are trying to heal one message at a time.

By Elsarien A. Katiti